i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
