new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize