If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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