How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Randomize
