Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
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