That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
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so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize