Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
