So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
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