with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
