is your mom at the bar?
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend