sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
The Olympian is in my bed
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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