the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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