we have pet lesbian snakes
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
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