Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Green mimosas i think yes
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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