So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
I woke up under a house in Key West
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