just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
