with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
