After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Randomize
