Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
