i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
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