And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize