He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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