i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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