I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Randomize
