i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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