come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
