My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
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God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
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Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize