You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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