great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize
