Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
