Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
