We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
