Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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