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• (214): View more from Texas

  did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  She'll never know what hit her

  (1-703): View more from Virginia

  I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.

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• (619): View more from California

  no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?

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  23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (870): View more from Arkansas

  i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems

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• (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.

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  These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious

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• (504): View more from Louisiana

  Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.

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• (520): View more from Arizona

  Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Your word choices worry me.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song

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• (315): View more from New York

  I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night

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• (204): View more from Manitoba

  He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.

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