I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Randomize
