remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Randomize
