nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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