Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
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