Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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