I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
