he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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