Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
