Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
You ever have a fart follow you around?
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