You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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