somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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