We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
