Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Randomize
