She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
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