it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
