we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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