Just mADE A PArabola og urine
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
